Terrible Beauty

I've never, in over two and a half years of being home from my service as a missionary in the Baltimore, Maryland mission, posted about my time there. Today is the day. Exactly four years ago, on April 6, 2016,  I entered the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah. I remember that day like it… Continue reading Terrible Beauty

Drowning to Survive

7:18 p.m.  Breathe. Hold it. Sink.  Listen... Rise.  Breathe. Hold it.  Sink.  Listen.. Gasp.  Choke.  Breathe. Hold it.  Sink.  Listen.  Breathe.  7:22 p.m.  I’ve never tried to drown myself. Tonight might have changed that.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my life, but tonight I needed a break. I needed to just stop living for… Continue reading Drowning to Survive

The Hippie Palace

Sometimes you just have to use your imagination to make a bad situation bearable. Our weekend adventure in Puerto Viejo was interesting to say the least. We arrived in the town after a five hour bus ride tired and ready to collapse into the relative comfort of our Airbnb. An Airbnb we found weeks prior.… Continue reading The Hippie Palace

Satisfied: How I Recognized and Overcame My Anxiety

Misunderstanding Those of you who know me, know for the span of my nearly 18-month service mission with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints I was sick. Constant pain racked my gut the moment I entered the missionary training center. Within a week of of leaving home the pain was so intense I… Continue reading Satisfied: How I Recognized and Overcame My Anxiety

Just A Thought

This morning I woke up late. On Tuesdays, two other volunteers and I head up to the school early to teach. Something in the kid's schedule makes Tuesdays hard for about 10 or 11 of them to come during the normal hours so we wake up earlier for them. Or at least we're supposed to.… Continue reading Just A Thought

Home

I'm no stranger to leaving home. I served an 18-month mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, have spent a couple years away at college and now I'm in Costa Rica for three months. Besides that, the concept of home changed for me when my parents got a divorce. I was thirteen.… Continue reading Home

No Habla Ingles

My pathetic first words to our Uber driver on Saturday. I like to think I speak enough Spanish to get what I need and get where I'm going. I can say, "Hello, how are you?" and provide an adequate response when someone says that to me. But my first words to that poor Uber driver… Continue reading No Habla Ingles

No One Will Remember

The Lie I Tell Myself Every Day My biggest fear is leaving a bad impression. Being a bad memory in someone else's mind. At one point I cared so much about what people thought of me it made me physically sick. Now I'm in a place where I don't know if I'm leaving a bad… Continue reading No One Will Remember

At Least I’m Alive

Sometimes you just have to think positive. Make a list of all the good things going for you. For example: I wasn't eaten by a crocodile todayMy shoes didn't give me blisters againI finally found the time to shave my legsThe Hamilton soundtrack downloaded on my phoneI ate an orange and a fruit tart for… Continue reading At Least I’m Alive